The Government Wants to Out Your Driveway

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Driveway

I have been noticing lots of signs lately that announce citizens’ hidden driveways. The government is just out of control. I’ve never had a hidden driveway, but I am outraged that the government would take it on themselves to point out something that citizens clearly want to remain discreet.

Let’s think about the whole point of a hidden driveway. Perhaps there are safety concerns—people do not want people driving by to know that there is a driveway there. If the thieves or serial murderers can’t find your house, they won’t break in and take your stuff or kill you, right? Or maybe you like your peace and quiet. You don’t want Jehovah’s Witnesses and vacuum salesmen coming to your door. Maybe there are other reasons, but the point is that there are good reasons to hide your driveway.

You’ve planted your trees and grass to narrow your driveway, perhaps removed the concrete and laid down dirt that blends in with the surrounding dirt, maybe even angled the entrance to hide your driveway more completely from one direction of traffic (the side towards the city perhaps, because you would rather people see your driveway in the morning on the way to work: less chance of a burglary in the morning, right?).

Along comes the state—and puts a bright yellow sign announcing your hidden driveway. It might as well read, “ATTENTION ALL MISCREANTS, MISSIONARIES, AND SALESMEN. HIDDEN DRIVEWAY AHEAD. DO NOT MISS THIS OPPORTUNITY.”

This is a private property rights issue. Some people don’t mind a visible driveway, inviting all manner of pedestrians to walk up to their door and bother them, but some people hide their driveways to maintain a way of life they desire. Government needs to leave us alone. Stop seeking out hidden driveways to expose! Get a life!

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Jonathan Meadows earned a B.A. in Philosophy from the University of New Hampshire and an MSc in Criminology and Criminal Justice from the University of Oxford. He was a member of staff on the Ovide Lamontagne for New Hampshire Governor campaign in 2012. He is also co-founder and writer at rednewhampshire.wordpress.com. Follow him on twitter @JnthnMdws.
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  • bev

    I totally disagree on this. I personally appreciate “hidden driveway” signs. It alerts me that someone may come pulling out in front of me from among the landscaping. I take it as a sign of caution to prevent accidents, not another government ploy against privacy. This article is a reach, in my opinion.

    • CarlyDHill

      The author’s intention was to be facetious on this particular non-issue to point out a larger truth – that the government is too involved in our lives. The intent is slight sarcasm rooted in truth

  • Carly

    The author’s intention was to be facetious on this particular non-issue to point out a larger truth – that the government is too involved in our lives. The intent is slight sarcasm rooted in truth

  • Judy

    Tear it down and put up an electric fence. They will get quite a buzz when they try to put it back.

  • Rod

    Not a fan of signs but private driveways are amazing money makers if you as an owner want to rent out spaces to needy drivers. http://www.CurbFlip.com is a great new app that makes this happen!